"Springaphobia, Tale of Darkness and Woe"
By Aleksa
Note: This is in response to two of Sharra's challenges from a while back.
It's um... an interesting little doozy I worked up in about half an hour
when the challenge was first posted but never bothered (or remembered) to
post. I think most of you'll like it. ^_^
It was a warm, sunny day in the forest. Birds were singing,
flowers were blooming, and the whole place screamed - the most beautiful
possible way - the news that Spring had sprung.
Sage strolled between the trees, taking it all in. The great
weather had the Ronin of Spirit's spirit soaring, and he wasn't about to
stay indoors. Not today. A bemused smile played at his lips as he watched
White Blaze prance around nearby, sniffing the strange and new scents in
the air. Looked like he wasn't either.
Spotting a large, crooked tree that stood nearly in two pieces,
he moved off the beaten path and into the wild brush. The tree had been struck
by lightning years ago, splitting it straight down the trunk, and it had
always been one of Sage's favorite spots.
He climbed over a dead tree trunk about thirty yards past the
lightning tree. On the other side there was a large, flat-topped boulder
sitting between two gnarled grey trees. This was his favorite spot to meditate,
where he went when his world was falling apart to pick up all the pieces
and solve the puzzle again. Nothing so depressing drove him there today.
Today was a day of peace and beauty; a day in which to envelope the senses
completely and without apprehension or complication.
Sage sat indian-style on the rock, his eyes shut - but not
so much so that no light slipped in - and his hands rested in his lap. His
breathing was deep and slow, with a steady rhythm that soothed him right
through to the soul. He was vaguely aware of White Blaze dozing next to the
rock, as he was aware of the sun over his head and the wind caressing his
cheek, but it was a passing familiarity next to the peace and clarity of
his meditative state.
He could have been there for seconds or days when suddenly
a shrill squawk pierced the sweetly-flowered air. "Oh, Saaagey dear! Oh,
hello!" it called. "Whatever are you doing out here all alone on this fine
spring day?"
Sage's one visible pale-violet eye snapped open and shot so
far out of his skull that it had to use long distance to send signals to
his brain.
In the middle of a grove of huge, pink sakura-filled trees,
a big, ugly head bobbed toward him. The head was crowned with bright yellow,
pink and white flowers and bore a humongous, toothy grin that had been outlined
by the brightest, thickest red lipstick he'd ever seen. Two dark, rosy stop
signs covered the head's cheeks.
"Talpa?!" Sage squeaked. No way, it couldn't be!
It giggled. Talpa giggled. A high-pitched, girlish giggle.
"Why, of course it's me, you siwwy wiwwy Wonin, you! Hehhehe," he laughed,
veerry Elmer Fudd-like as he skipped over to him and pinched his cheek.
"Bu... bu... but... you can't be! What the heck happened to
you?!"
It giggled again, sitting on the stone, right next to Sage
- that is, if big ugly heads slaughtered with make-up can sit. "Now that
doesn't really matter, does it?"
Sage was just about to say that it did, but he missed his chance
due to the large bouquet of wildflowers that were flung into his face. "These
are for you, Sagey Wagey!"
"F-for me?" Sage gulped.
"Mm hmm," Talpa nodded.
"Um... what for?"
"Oh, come now! I think we both know the answer to that!" Talpa
chastized, leaning in close to Sage as if to say "Kiss me, I'm Talpa!" Like
a diabolical button-maker's best scheme...
Sage's immediate reaction was to hide, run for cover. But instead,
he found himself oddly hypnotized. That bold smile... those gorgeous eyes...
that... pocket full of posies!
Despite himself, Sage, too, leaned in - close, oh, so very
close - and when they locked lips, it was the most beautiful and exhilerating
experience of his life. Could it be? Was it...
LOVE?!
"Nooooooooooo!! No! No! No!" Sekhmet screamed in terror, jumping
straight up in his bed and standing on it, his head whipping around to check
that he was alone in the room.
Panting and wide-eyed, he slid down to an awkward sitting position.
Whipping open a bedside drawer, Sekhmet tentatively drew a bushy object from
it.
"He loves me... he loves me not... he loves me...
he loves me not... he loves me... he loves me NOT! God da-argh! Damn you,
Halo! Damn you with your cursed good looks... Dang it! Shoot! GR!"
A few seconds later, "He loves me... he loves me not..."