By Sailor Opal
I must agree that chickens are an excellent choice of mascots, but they
won't work everywhere. That is why I am about to suggest a back-up or
alternate mascot if you will.
As a Public Relations professional I know the value of having a back-up
plan. What if you send you mascot out into battle and something happens?
The morale of your minions may plummet and you could lose their support.
We can't afford to have that happen. Image is everything.
I suggest you keep a handful of slugs handy. Coming from a temperate
rainforest I see the damage they cause daily. Have you ever seen a slug in
full battle rage? It is a sight that haunts me to this day.
Set out a few angry slugs and your enemies will fall to their knees,
literally. You of course should be in the next country. If you can't then
I suggest you wear a HazMat suit for protection.
After your enemies have finished retching it will be simple to subdue
them.
I thank you for your consideration.
Sailor Opal APR
Public Relations to Anime Stars
{Whether they want it or not}